The Genuine Article
by OrpheumZero
Summary: A quick little one shot based on an old folk tale. Luffy's treasured hat is so sacred to him, that even the offer of a new one is just absurd! Please read and review!


The Genuine Article

I'm supposed to focusing on my Steambot Chronicles story, and here I am whipping up another One Piece one-shot. This was inspired by the old honest axe story. Yet another one of those 'popped into my head' kind of stories. This doesn't really have a set point in the story, but is more or less around the early days of Luffy and the gang's travels before the Grand Line. Anyway, enjoy!

The small port town bustled with activity, with traders and merchants alike setting up shop to do business. The small crew of five, the Straw Hats, were making their way through the densely packed docks, taking in the sights.

"Awesome! I wonder if there's place where they sell meat?" Luffy looked around excitedly, drool beginning to pool over his open mouth as hungry eyes looked around. A sigh could be heard beside the youth, Nami rubbing her temple in an effort to not lose her temper.

"We have plenty of meat back on the Merry. Not to mention the fact that you ate about two hours ago!" The red haired girl said, giving her captain a firm look. Luffy frowned, looking strangely hurt for a simple reminder, "But I'm hungry now, Nami!" Luffy whined, his eyes quivering like a puppy dog.

"I SAID NO!" The navigator snapped, her face briefly looking demonic as she flashed a serious glare at the boy, who pouted and turned away from the girl.

"This place is probably stocked with some really delicious foods." The chain smoking chef, Sanji, said as he ogled a pair of passing girls, who giggled politely as they waved him by. "Really delicious..." He echoed.

"Maybe we can find a better cook, one who doesn't chase skirts like some sad dog." Zoro, the green haired swordsman remarked, ignoring the glaring eye of the blonde.

"How about you say that to my face, mold head."

"Gladly, casanova." And before any of the hundred of bystanders knew it, a full out fight erupted between the two men.

"Come on, guys, let's be reasonable." The long-nosed liar, Ussop nervously said, his quaking knees shaking even more as he noticed more perplexed looks from the growing crowd of people.

"Oh I will be, once I make this shitty swordsman eat his own words, and maybe those lousy knives of his."

"Fat chance, curly cue."

"OH YOU'RE DEAD NOW!"

"NO, YOU'RE BOTH DEAD!" Nami thundered, leaping deftly into the air to land a blow on both of the dueling men head, knocking both out cold. Cracking her knuckles, the fiery girl eyed the crowd, "Nothing to see here, folks. **Move**." Her eyes flashed on the last word, the gawking people yelped and dispersed like a flock of disturbed geese.

"Hahahahahaha, this place sure is fun!" Luffy bellowed, thoroughly enjoying the antics of his crew and the people around them. Suddenly a gust of wind kicked up, blowing strongly like a gale through the street.

"Kya!" Nami, and a few other women shrieked as the powerful gust flew back, their skirts fluttering. The resounding 'thud' of Sanji hitting the ground with a look of joy on his bloodstained face was ignored by an alarming cry of "MY HAT!" and the sight of a ratty looking straw hat fluttering through the air.

"Hey, Luffy!" Ussop called after the raven haired youth as he charged down a busy street after the hat as it continued to drift listlessly like a bird. The others quickly followed suit, mostly because of the possible trouble they knew he was likely to land himself in.

"Hey, come back hat!" Luffy called after the flying hat while trying to snatch with his stretchy arms, only to miss by the slightest each time. Frustration quickly settled in, prompting the utterance of "Jerk wind!"

"Luffy, wait up!" Nami called some distance behind, her breath coming in short gasps as she struggled to keep up with the boy. The chase went through a busy plaza, where angry shouts soon erupted after Luffy plowed through several street performers, and out of town, towards a nearby forest.

"This is one strange wind..." Zoro thought to himself, perplexed by the hat's continued flight in breeze. Finally the wind began to die down, and Luffy's familiar chuckle could be heard.

"Stupid wind, thought you could steal my hat!" He said, waiting for the right moment to snatch for his hat. The wind finally stopped, and the hat drifted down... right into a waterfall flowing over a large lake.

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Luffy's jaw dropped as he watched the treasured hat get sucked under the water. The others finally caught up, breathless.

"So... did you... get it back?" Sanji asked, looking beat from the sudden chase. But no answer came, only the startling sight of Luffy nearly leaping headlong into the lake.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Nami shrieked, pulling Luffy back in time, only to be met with that rare look of seriousness from Luffy.

"I have to get my hat back." He said, resolute.

"Yea, and maybe you've forgotten; YOU CAN'T SWIM!" Nami retorted, smacking the youth across the head hard, the only thing that ever seemed to cause a genuine pain to Luffy outside of fighting.

"Um guys?..." Ussop's voice tried to interject, but was ignored as Nami and Luffy continued to glare at one another.

"Seriously, that stupid hat is going to be the death of you." Nami said haughtily. Luffy stuck out his tongue, not in the least amused by the comment.

"My hat is not stupid!" He replied.

"Guys." Ussop called again, prompting the bickering crewmates to turn and glare the liar.

"WHAT?" They both asked, the force of their angry response knocking the curly hair youth on his rear. He then jerked a thumb over his shoulder, towards the lake. Luffy and Nami followed with annoyed expressions, which were quickly replaced by the strangest sight.

A woman, dressed in a light blue gown with platinum hair, hovered over the lake. Her radiant countenance was enhanced by her golden glow, as though she were made of a gleaming stone.

"Fair travelers, I am the guardian deity of the lake. I believe you have misplaced something dear that belongs to you." She spoke in a hauntingly calm voice. While most of the crew stared in awe, Sanji immediately beamed with his usual love-struck gaze.

"Ah, have my dreams come true? A goddess has blessed me with her graceful appearance! Tell me, my dearest, is it not my heart that you've found?" He asked, reaching out and grasping the mysterious woman's hand tenderly and giving it a gentle peck. Now it was the goddess' turn to look confused. She cleared her throat, and held her hands behind her back.

"Um... I apologize, kind sir, but you're mistaken." She said, then brought her hands out from behind her back, holding two gleaming objects. Both were hats much like Luffy's, but one was made of the finest silver, while the other sparkled like the richest gold. One could almost hear the clinging sound as Nami's eyes changed in Berri signs. Her soft, ethereal eyes settled on Luffy with a knowing look.

"Was it the golden hat that you lost?" She asked with a soft smile. Luffy scratched his head, frowning.

"No, my hat's just a regular old straw one." He said, prompting Nami to elbow him in the ribs.

"What are you doing?" She hissed, Luffy knitted his brow, confused, "What. It isn't my hat." He said as he tenderly rubbed his chest. The goddess sweat-dropped, then held up the silver hat.

"Then perhaps it is this silver hat that you misplaced?" She asked in the same tone as before. Luffy tilted his head, looking slightly annoyed.

"You're a very stupid deity, aren't you?" He asked flatly, and was laid flat on the ground by Sanji not a second later from a kick to the head.

"Shitty bastard! How dare you insult this lovely goddess? I should have just let Nami let you drown in the lake!" The chef bellowed as Luffy got up and groaned, "Oww, Sanji. What was that for?"

"Hmm. I see, you are truly an honest young man. Even if you are bit... unorthodox." The lake goddess said, bringing attention back on her as she placed both hands behind her back once again, this time reappearing with a familiar looking hat. Luffy, who was half-way ready to start a fight with Sanji, beamed with joy, quickly grabbing for the straw hat.

"Ah! My hat! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Luffy cried with joy as he placed the hat back on his head and began to dance around excitedly. The goddess grinned, as if expecting the outcome all along.

"For your honest and truthful responses, I bestow to you both the silver and gold hats." She said, allowing both hats to gently float down into Luffy's hands, their feel as soft as the original straw hat, "Farewell, travelers, may your journeys be rich and full of wonder..." And in the blink of an eye, the woman vanished, leaving Luffy and the others in silence. Back in town, the crew was walking through the streets in a tight group, admiring the new hats.

"Those things are amazing! It's like someone took use a literal gold and silver threading!" Ussop remarked.

"I could probably make a fortune off of these babies!" Nami mused cuddling the gold her to bosom like a child, a child made of cold hard cash. Luffy was absently twirling the silver one on his fingertips.

"Hey now, that goddess or whatever gave them to Luffy, they're his!" Ussop said, snatching the gold hat from her and handing it back to Luffy. The cat thief shot the liar a deadly look, but relented a moment later as she considered the facts.

"Well, Luffy? What do you plan to do with your new treasures?" Nami asked sweetly, as if the clueless boy would somehow pick up on the hint to hand them over to her. All eyes fell on Luffy, who continued to walk as he held both hats.

"They're kinda cool... But they'll never be anything like the _read deal_." He smirked as he adjusted his own straw hat, then in a heartbeat, tossed the two hats into the air without even looking. Both hats sparkled and gleamed in the afternoon sun as they twirled in the air, then get swallowed up in the sea of pedestrians crowding the streets.

"Did he just?..." Sanji asked aloud, stunned.

"Yep." Zoro answered, smirking and shaking his head.

"Now let's go find some meat!" Luffy said, starting to march off ahead of the others.

"Luffy!" An angry growl sounded, and Luffy turned to see his navigator bearing down on him like a bat out of hell.

"Huh? Wait, Nami! NOO!" But the plea of mercy was ignored as Luffy was clocked right upside the head and sent flying into the air. Zoro, Ussop, and Sanji squinted their eyes as they watched their captain soar through the air like, his surprised cry carrying in the wind.

THE END.


End file.
